Even though it was said in Proverbs 18:22 that, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favour from the Lord.” It is not all the time that this scripture is true. So many people had found a Wife and found bad luck, setbacks and even early death. So many people’s lives, both Men and Ladies alike today are ruined as a result of finding a Wife or a Husband all in the name of marriage and what they found became the end of their lives.
Sometimes it feels like a lie when one reads in the scripture that; you find a good spouse, you find a good life — and even more: the favor of God! And yet shortly after the Wedding day, it is suddenly done to you that the person you’re married to is a monster from the pit of hell assigned to destroy you. The longer you stay with him/her the harder life gets with you and whenever you want to pull out, there is one religious person somewhere reminding you that “God hates divorce” and therefore you must continue to endure the pains and the hardship all in the name of “God hates divorce”.
God hates divorce but loves seeing you suffering in the hands of a Man or a Lady all in the name of marriage when it was clearly stated in 3 John 2; “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.” If you being married to someone denied you the right and the opportunity to prosper in all things and be in health then you’re not in a marriage, you’re in a Dungeon. You’re in Prison and the one that put you in that Prison will not let go of you if you fail to free yourself.
Marriage is good only when you find a good Lady for a Wife and a good Man for a Husband. It is then and only then that it will show that the Lord is good to you. Now, it’s not really that the Lord is not good to you if you choose wrongly, He is always good to us all. But the fact remains that it is not God’s duty to choose a Wife or Husband for anyone. Abraham chose Sarah, not God, Abraham chose Rebekah for Isaac, not God, Laban chose Leah for Jacob or let me say forced Leah on Jacob, Jacob chose Rachel for himself, but unfortunately, Rachel died earlier than expected.
Many of us are like Jacob, individuals that are easily get carried away by what they can see. In Gen 29:18 it was said that “Jacob loved Rachel”. What brings about that sudden love for Rachel? The answer is in Gen 29:17 where it was said that “Rachel was beautiful of form and appearance.” Rachel is a one can describe as Figure Eight. The delight of Men of status. The elegant well well-structured Lady. Such are the kind of Ladies some Men are after and these are the very ones that end their lives before time. As my Grandmother used to say, “A Lady with beauty without character will one day either kill herself or the husband. Either way, one of them must die”.
Osinachi Nwachukwu is dead today, not because of her character towards her marriage, but because of her religious beliefs. I’ve heard so many people condemning the family, the church and her Pastor for allowing her to remain in a bad marriage and I’ve heard and read about her Pastor saying that he wasn’t aware of her Marital issues. How truth that is, is best known to God. But the truth is, even if he as the Pastor did not know, how about the wife? Someone is lying.
Women are built with the instinct of knowing things even though sometimes they pretend as if they don’t. Recently, I was on the phone with a very good friend of mine. The daughter walked into the room. Now, I’ve never for once spoken with the daughter or her knowing anything about me. But the moment the daughter entered the room and saw my friend on the phone, she said “Good morning Pastor Sam”. And my friend was like, “How do you know whom I’m talking to?” And the daughter said, “I know…!”
This is a lady I’ve never spoken to before then and yet she could picked whom my friend was talking to on the phone. That is the power of a Female Gender for you. They know things and yet, they’ll pretend not to. I feel so sorry for the Men who think that their Wives know nothing about their escapades. She’s only watching you and allowing peace to reign.
Anyway; I’m not interested in pointing fingers against anyone. But trust me on this; people don’t like to associate with negative issues or persons; churches and pastors are not exceptional to the rule. So, don’t be surprised if the same person who is smiling and laughing with you now denies you in a few seconds hereafter for hearing something negative about you. Human beings are always ready to use you and dump you. That’s the reality of life. As Tuface said, “If you don’t use them, den go use you”.
As far as I can tell, Osinachi Nwachukwu died long before her physical death. In one of the reports I read, her Twin Sister, Osinachi was never interested in the man. Then after much pressure from the man and her rejecting his proposal, the man left, then after some time, he showed up again and they started dating and then got married.
Friends, listen and listen well. That was never God or man; that was pure Juju. Correct African cham from a wicked spiritualist. If you think that because you pray in tongues, you go to church every day and you are closer to your Pastor some things cannot happen to you, you deceive yourself. Osinachi was much anointed in every sense and had a strong heart for God. How come the cham worked on her and held her bond in Marital bondage even to her death? Think about that.
God did not ask you to be spiritual, He asked you to be wise as the Serpent and armless as the Dove. My question is, how wise are you? Again Jesus said, “The children of this world are wiser than the children of the Kingdom”. I ask you again, how wise are you? Spirituality without wisdom is stupidity. So many stupid and ignorant people are in the church. Most especially the Pentecostal churches.
For a person to say yes to someone she had once said no to is not a big deal; people change their minds we can say. But the Bible admonished us to test all spirits. I expected her family to carry out diligence on the Man before they allowed him to marry their daughter, but they did not. Her family failed her big time.
I understand Osinachi’s decision to keep everything going to herself and beg the few people who are aware of it to keep it secret. I was guilty of the same. I kept painting my ex white in the presence of everyone even when I was going through hell in the marriage; until one day, one of the church members said to me; “Pastor, please stop praising your wife. We all know that she doesn’t love you. You’re the one that loves her”.
In marriage, we make decisions that are totally beyond our control. Not because of any other things rather than the fact that we don’t want to offend God and miss heaven; or we don’t want to bring shame to our family. I quite understand. But the facts remain that you cannot change a person that had not made up his or her mind to change. Change of character and attitudes is a personal decision not enforcement from others. It is an internal thing, not an external force or influence. Her family should have forced her out of the marriage. Get the Police to arrest him for beating their daughter. Or maybe his Juju also worked on them.
All religions have so much power to kill you. And the first thing religion does is kill your ability to think for yourself and make the decisions that they think are best for you. Thereafter, it’s killed your destiny and chartered your dreams. You’re zero. No religion will take you to heaven. Take it or leave it. The only thing that guarantees your eternity is your labour of love towards your fellow human beings and your fulfilment of purpose in life.
All the religion in the world forbids divorce. Claiming that God hates divorce. But the question is, does God love it that you die in a bad marriage? I don’t think and I believe he does. Divorce is permitted when you are not feeling safe in your marriage.
So many religious leaders and their Spouses are facing hell in their Marriages but religion and spirituality without wisdom and understanding will not let them walk out of the bad marriage. Marriage is a life, once you don’t have it in your marriage, take a walk before it leads to your death.
May the souls of the departed ones as a result of domestic violence continue to rest in peace. But what happened to those who are still alive enduring the pains and the abuse, even the loss of so many things all in the name of marriage?
A Man of honour is never a Man who defends himself, but a Man who defends the ideologies and the institution he stands for; a Man whose values are beyond personalities or recognitions from Men.
I watched a Television interview granted by Emeka Ike, I watched the interview granted by the Ex-Wife and the son; I also read the post-Emeka’s brother made and the question that came to heart was very simple.
If Emeka Ike was a Bad Man and a brutal husband and father as the Ex-wife and the son presented him to be…
a. How come, Emeka Ike picked her and married her without educational qualifications of any kind?
A Man who doesn’t love you will never marry you if your standards of life and education are lower than his.
b. How come, Emeka Ike sent her to the University when he only attended Yaba College of Technology?
A Man that doesn’t love you will never give you the right or permission to be greater than him.
c. How come Emeka Ike established businesses and put her in charge of running those businesses?
Only a Man who loves you and trusts you can entrust you with his source of income. Men usually don’t allow their wives to be part of their business.
d. How come, Emeka Ike made her a signatory to his account?
Men are usually in the habit of keeping their money away from their Wives. But he gave the Wife access to his money so that she could withdraw any amount of money she so wished.
Now, before our Social Media sisters-in-law, judges and lawyers will begin to cast stones; ask yourself if your Husband or Husband-to-be can do this or is doing this. If he’s not, then you should give credit to those that did.
The Ex-Wife came on television to claim that Emeka Ike was in the habit of beating her. But she never told us that she was the one who first slapped him because the husband was trying to correct her for not taking proper care of their daughter.
The light was shunned on this truth when Emeka Ike’s former Personal Assistant came out to tell the whole world what led to that.
I’m not in support of a Man beating his wife or the Wife beating the husband and I will never be part of that. But please, be honest, how many of you dare to sell your husband’s businesses and run away because of his beating?
I used to know a Deacon in RCCG who used to beat the Wife and leave her in her pool of blood. Twice this Man beat the Wife to the point of coma. It took me a whole year to pray her out of that marriage. Because of the money the husband was donating to the church, their Pastor kept telling her to endure, God hates divorce. She never for one day sold or took anything that belonged to her husband.
She left the Marriage with honour and integrity.
Despite selling all the husband had then, Emeka Ike’s Ex-Wife still cannot train or give quality education to the children.
She took the son away from the school the father put him in Abuja to further his education and never put the boy in any school but was quick to get the boy a job in a restaurant. I’m so sorry to say, I do not consider such a person as a life-giver. She is a life killer. Destiny Destroyer Pro Max.
If you think or believe that what Emeka Ike’s Ex-Wife did to him was right, then I pray that the Lord God of heaven will give your son/sons such a Lady for a Wife so that you can see and feel how painful it is.
Emeka Ike is a bad husband and yet he built a house for her in Lagos and Isoko her hometown. The last time I checked, not so many Men do that. Only a good Man with a sense of responsibility, a Man that means well for his Wife will do such a thing.
Emeka Ike is a bad husband and yet you had two children for him before you asked him to pay your Bride Price which he did without hesitation and you still have another child for him after the Wedding and yet you claimed he is a bad person.
If your claim is true, why did you ask him to pay for your Bride Price? Why did you have children for him? I’m sure no person in her right mind will get pregnant by a bad person unless the person herself is bad.
In one of her statements, she said that she married Emeka Ike because she wanted to be a model and she thought Emeka could be of help to her to be a successful model. But unfortunately, she never shares her dream of becoming a model with him.
This also means that she did not marry him because she loved him, but because she wanted to use him to build her career as a model and probably dump him once she became successful as a model.
So many Ladies do this. They pretended to love a man because they needed a place to stay, someone to take care of them, someone to have a child or two with and ended the marriage. Before you comment on this, check your heart, do you marry the Man in your love because you love him or because you are using him to meet a need in your life?
The Son, on the other hand, came up to say that the Father said so many hateful words to him because of his love for Music, and smiling; you can tell when a person is programmed to lie.
Many of us have no idea of what Evil people can do to manipulate our children against us and indirectly destroy the future of the children. May you never come across Evil Men or Women who will program the hearts and minds of your children against you. I wish my father was alive to tell his story.
If what the son said was true, how come the same father put him in Nigeria Turkish International College, a Private School in Abuja, do you know what it means to have a child in that school; and the mother took him away from there and that’s the end of his education; and now he works in a restaurant in Lagos. I don’t think a Man who doesn’t mean well for his son will do such a thing.
The last time I checked, Men don’t spend on a child they don’t believe in his or her future. Yes, the father must have said those things but not in the same manner he presented it to be. Falz had always wanted to be a musician, but their father stood against it and forced him to study law. He did and still went back to his music. I’m sure you and I have no idea of the kinds of things the father would have said to him then.
Even Davido was faced with the same dilemma. The father practically disowned him because he wanted to be a musician. So, whatever Emeka would have said to his son then was never out of the lane. Every reasonable parent who means well to their children will do just that; now that doesn’t mean that they are right, it only shows that their understanding is limited.
I watched Alibaba’s studio interview with the Honest Bunch where he said that his father refused to speak with him for good Ten years because he decided to be a Comedian instead of a Lawyer he wanted him to be. But today, it’s a different story.
Emeka Ike’s son should prove his father wrong instead of crying around like a baby over what he claimed the father said to him. He should turn that into a motivation to propel him to succeed as the Musician he chose to be and not all these his doing trying to destroy his father. Forgetting that someday he will be a father too.
There was a time when parents didn’t want their children to be Actors, Comedians, Footballers or Musicians because they considered those professions a waste of time. But today, it’s a different story entirely. I’m sure a larger percentage of us were once faced with such a dilemma with our Parents. So why crucify Emeka if he indeed said that?
I made it clear earlier that I’m not in support of a Man abusing his Wife or a Woman abusing her Husband. So, I’m not in support of Emeka beating his Wife even though we now know what led to that. In Igbo culture, it is an abomination for a wife to lift her hands against her Husband. The Wife did know that, why did she do that?
So many of the Ladies ranting and calling Emeka out on Social Media are facing worse demons in their homes and marriages with their husbands, how come they have not sold things that belong to the husband and left the marriage?
Some of us Men who are questioning his actions are doing worse things to our Wives at home and still painting ourselves to be one superhero. What happened between Emeka and the Ex-Wife is a lesson for us all as far as I can tell.
I don’t have issues with her leaving. It’s normal to leave a Man or Woman if you know that your living together as Husband and Wife is no longer comfortable. But destroying the same person before leaving is uncalled for. That’s just the fact.
According to him, if he was broke then, he probably has Fifteen Million Naira in his account. Do you know what that means? By now, he would have been a billionaire but his Ex-wife destroyed all that because of her greed, lack of foresight and evil-mindedness.
As far as I can tell, there is more to Emeka Ike’s Ex-Wife’s personality and act. What she did is a criminal offence with serious consequences, that is if Emeka Ike chose to seek justice.
I know some people will be so quick to say that Emeka Ike is a Narcissist, well, from what I know about Narcissist, they don’t joke with their money and Ladies who are married to Narcissist will tell you that their narcissistic husbands don’t joke with his money. They don’t spend on the Wife and Children, they always run the Wife down and never support her dreams or ambitions.
A Narcissist Is an Eyes service person, always doing something to impress outsiders but never his Wife and Children.
A Narcissist will never talk about his marriage in public not to talk of saying anything about it on Media, never.
A Narcissist is a quiet-going person who will make friends and relatives too and the Wife believes that he is a good person, but he or she is not.
Never talk about a Narcissist if you’ve not lived with one.
Some people will also claim that he is a Narcissist which is why he married a Lady far Younger than him so that he can control her. Well, the last time I checked, it is a normal thing for Men to marry Younger Ladies, a larger percentage of us. Just a few of us married Ladies that are the same age as us or older than us. So, it is very normal for an Igbo Man to marry a Lady far Younger than him. I have Sisters who married from Igbo Land and I witnessed their brothers getting married to Girls who are far younger than they are; most of them with 23, 25 and even 30 years difference. So, the age difference is nothing but just a number.
The question we all should ask ourselves is, what exactly did she do with all the money she made from her husband’s businesses? She should be made to account for it.
Friends, be careful when you are choosing a life partner. He or she will either make you or Mar you.
Sam Adeoye
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